By Michele-Weiner Davis As a veteran marriage therapist with nearly 40 years of experience, I am one of a group of professionals who have found that the format of the traditional “60-minute” therapy session repeated week after week is impractical-even inherently flawed. Instead I, along with a number of my colleagues, now offer two-day couples […]
Friendship Before Sex: A New Plan for Finding Love
By Sara Goff “Young love is a flame; very pretty, very hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. The love of the older and disciplined heart is as coals, deepburning, unquenchable.” ~ Henry Ward Beecher (from RQ Relationship Intelligence by Richard A. Panzer) In my late twenties, I found myself in a two-year […]
Loving Service — The Basic Principle of Magnanimous Marriage
By Krsnanandini Devi Dasi, CFLE A few years ago, my husband, Tariq and I presented a seminar on the concept of what we term “Magnanimous Marriage.” In such a marriage, husband and wife are actual benefactors for one another. Benefactor is defined as a kindly helper, a person who benefits and supports another. “A happy […]
Thirty Years In: A Reflection on “Soul Mates”
By Jennifer Grant A friend posts a status update, tagging his wife, on Facebook: A wedding anniversary is the celebration of love, trust, partnership, tolerance, and tenacity. The order varies in any given year. Thanks for 20 YEARS of all the above, my dearest! I think long-married people are less likely […]
Don’t Divorce — Why Mending Your Marriage Makes Better Sense
By Mike McManus Marriage has fallen on hard times. Half of America’s marriages have ended in divorce since 1975 – a divorce rate that is triple that of Britain or France. Dr. Diane Medved offers answers in a compelling new book, Don’t Divorce: Compelling Arguments for Saving and Revitalizing Your Marriage. It is must reading for […]
Save Your Marriage — Don’t Even THINK About Divorce!
By Suzanne Venker What’s your attitude toward marriage as an institution? Is it more traditional in nature, or does it match the culture’s more progressive, cavalier view? Your attitude is the single most important determiner of your success in life. Life will throw you a thousand curve balls. So will marriage. But it isn’t the curve balls […]
By Michele Weiner-Davis Not So Fast. Lately, there’s been a lot of talk about the fact that monogamy is an outdated, unrealistic and suffocating institution. “After all,” we’re told, “human beings simply aren’t wired to have only one sexual partner. It’s unnatural, unworkable, unrealistic.” Additionally, even though it’s natural to be attracted to other people, […]
In Praise of the Tenacity of Marriage
By Jennifer Grant At the small, religious college I attended, some girls joked that they were there to earn a “Mrs.” degree. I steered clear of them; their preoccupation with finding husbands seemed not only ridiculous but also pathetic to me. And I had plans. After college, I’d go to grad school, write a novel, […]
My Affair Just Happened. . .
By Michele Weiner-Davis I’ve been a therapist for a very long time. I’ve encountered people from all walks of life with varied viewpoints, personalities, strengths and idiosyncratic quirks. I’m never bored, rarely shocked and almost never irritated. But the operative word here is “almost.” I have lost count of the number of times when a spouse who’s been […]
She Was My First . . .
By Jason Williams My wife Amanda was determined to save herself for her husband, to give him something special that no other man had ever received. I was her first, but she was not mine. That fact has been a source of hurt during our marriage. For her, it’s the reality of knowing that physical […]